I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
