Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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