My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
