How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
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