Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
