i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
whose parrot is this?
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Randomize
