I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
