okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
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