The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
