I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
You had me at "let me see your balls"
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
