you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
