I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
