your room smells of hookers.
And success
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize