I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
