I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
