Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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