in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
