the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
