he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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