He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
i came on her dog
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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