His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize
