Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Randomize
