you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Randomize