Are we in a gay sports bar?
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
i already hear my dad disowning me
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
