I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
