if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
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