I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize