You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
