I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
