Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Life is so much better after having sex.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I just forgot I was standing up.
Randomize
