garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
