I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
