shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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