Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
