A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
I wish I could punch you in the face.
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Randomize
