DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
