Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
