I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Randomize
