dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
