I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
