fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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