I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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