I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
