Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
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