It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Randomize
