if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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