I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Randomize
