my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
