Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
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