She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
